Confidence. Sometimes we have loads of the stuff and sometimes we have zilch.
I see strong, independent women wrestling with low self-confidence daily and it breaks my heart because these women are a force and confidence could take them so much further personally and professionally.
More often than not they’re too busy focusing on why everyone else is so amazing and well equipped, or because they have such a fear of being arrogant that their idea of confidence has been muddled up in that perception and is now tainted.
It seems like low confidence hits when we actually need it the most… When we’re trying to take the next step in our career, making that all important call, when we doubt our parenting decisions or are thinking about signing up for that life changing opportunity… The limiting self-talk is the ultimate squasher of confidence and dreams.
I’m here to tell you I’ve got your back. You don’t need to have low self-confidence and having high self-confidence does NOT make you arrogant. It makes you a wonderful and valuable contributor to this world.
let me say that again for the people in the back...
Self-confidence does NOT make you arrogant!
I hope that by the time you finish reading it you realise what an amazing, unique and powerful human being you are and that you can stand confidently in the truth that you are perfectly imperfect and that, my friend, is your strength.
5 things you can do to
boost your confidence:
1. Spotlight the good. Make a list of everything you’ve ever done that you’re proud of. Everything good about yourself and everything you’re glad you are. Keep it somewhere you can look at it often! (You should feel amazing when you read this list, like you’ve just written a CV selling how awesome you are). Another way to do this, is to keep kind notes from others or store testimonials where you can see them often.
2. Check your self-talk. Start to become aware of when you tell yourself you can’t do something, when you’re fearful of potential outcomes or when you talk yourself out of something. You don’t have to change it yet. Just sit with it and become aware of when you might be chipping away at your own confidence.
3. Get an idea of what confidence is to you. You can’t achieve something if you don’t know what you’re aiming for. Describe the confidence of someone who inspires you, what is it about them that makes them radiate confidence? If you have a hang up about arrogance you might want to explore what arrogance is too, that way, you can make sure that you’re not heading down that path as much as you fear you might be! Clarity brings confidence and empowerment.
4. Re-write your internal script. You know limiting beliefs are happening (step 2), you know what you understand confidence to be (step 3) so now it’s time to build that confidence into your internal dialog. Start at the beginning, that very first thought that cuts away at your confidence, what would a confident person tell themselves instead? Keep it true to you and compelling and then act according to that new, positive voice!! Watch your life change baby step by baby step.
5. Stand tall. Literally change your posture to stand or sit tall to emulate confidence. Change your body and your mind will shift with it. (Try it right now and tell me I’m wrong).
If you can see the potential in these methods of building confidence but can’t quite get there yourself then don’t rule it out as an option available to you, why not be bold and come explore ways you can work with me 1:1 to create the change you're after. You can even schedule a free (and obligation free) 30min consultation with me via zoom here.
Creating an energising and fulfilling life is in your hands.
Steph Edmunds
About the Author:
Steph Edmunds is a Tasmanian based Certified Professional Life Coach, Speaker and Facilitator specialising in Work/Life Cohesion and Sustainable Excellence for driven individuals and teams. Visit the Success Coaching Tasmania website for more information.