I recently had dinner with two fabulous friends. Both are strong women who have inspired me since the very first day that I met each of them, both in very different stages of life.
By a stroke of luck all three of our lives crossed paths.
In fact, I believe said ‘stroke of luck’ was the age old tale of having babies around the same time. Motherhood is uniting and magic happens in mothers’ groups, let me tell you that for free! But if you’re a mum, you probably already knew that...
Can a Simple Question Change Your Life?
Picture this, it's now years on from first meeting, our little ones have grown, we’re out at dinner (cheerfully kid free might I add - giving each other our enthused and undying attention!), I’m half a glass of Riesling down and one of my beautiful friends shares that when we very first met, I asked her a question that changed the course of her life. Dramatic, right? I was as curious as you to be reminded of what I’d asked!
She said, “I’ll never forget it, I’ve never been so taken aback by an opening question in a casual conversation.”
At this point I’m thinking, ‘Oh no… what on earth did I say?’
She continued, “Straight off the mark, you asked me what my hobbies were and I was a bit stunned for a moment. I distinctly remember thinking that I didn’t want to not have an answer, so I told you I liked to write - which was vaguely true at the time.” We all laughed. Classic Steph… not one for small talk.
She went on, “As soon as I’d told you I liked writing, you grabbed onto the idea and being the connector that you are, you put me in touch with a lovely local ‘up and coming’ writer. As luck would have it, she was establishing a writing group of kindred spirits, and graciously asked me to join.” My heart was happy to hear this. But of course, this wasn’t new information. I’d known this for years, but still my heart smiled.
When this beautiful friend and I were both deep in the trenches with young babies, we saw each other less and less frequently, but it always made me happy to know that this connection between two writers had blossomed and expanded to include a tight knit writing group which was incredibly fruitful and life giving for my friend. A fun little aside to this story is that the promising ‘up and coming’ writer I had connected her in with is now a highly acclaimed author after publishing her AMAZING debut novel with Penguin in 2023. You may even have read it, it’s called The Secrets of the Huon Wren, by the fabulous, one and only, Claire vanRyn (who now has her second novel well and truly underway... watch this space!).
So, there we have it. What a lovely story about hobbies uniting people. Lovely, yes, but not the end of this story. What my friend shared with us next sent cheers of celebration bouncing around the (intimately small) restaurant… “Today, all those years on from that fateful question you asked me when we first met, baby step by baby step… I’ve finished the final words of my first novel.”
Now THIS is amazing!
Even more amazing is that it’s nowhere near the end of her story – there’s a whole exciting chapter ahead of her as she pursues publishing avenues to get her quirky, playful, murderous fiction set in the Tasmanian bush, into people’s hands. VERY exciting and incredibly amazing! BUT, I’d argue... this is STILL NOT the most amazing thing!
The Deep Ripple Effect of a Simple Question
The most amazing thing is that one simple question about hobbies fanned a flame and set in motion a sequence of events that would light a fire that would lead to a mother finding herself amid the beauty and chaos of motherhood with young, very adorable but very dependent little ones. A time when most women lose themselves.
Her hobby became the vehicle for her to carve out time for herself, her creativity, her passion and her identity beyond motherhood.
More than this (if there is such a thing!), her hobby has afforded her the opportunity to wrestle with, explore and process her fabulous and eccentric mother’s colourful journey through life, liberation and dementia through the art of writing.
She’s extracted life lessons for herself to hold to tightly, and in time, pass them down to her own children. The impact is generational.
What Does it Take to Change a Life?
Change comes in many ways, awareness is a big one. The world numbs us in a lot of ways, but when we listen to those internal and external nudges about what we want, need, miss or hunger for, then we can be spurred on to say yes to our passions. Beyong the 'yes' is an expansion of self, of joy and of our world. For my friend, this simple hobby that has taken conscious choice, self-advocacy, commitment, effort, support and discipline, has been the source of a deep well of riches in many facets of her life.
I honestly can’t wait to update this blog with a link to her published book… just you wait. Her time will come – she really is a fabulous writer.
Here's How my Friend’s Story of Rekindling a Dormant Hobby is Relevant to You & Your Life...
Like any good story, there’s gold hidden in it. Gold that makes it VERY relevant indeed. Let me share the lessons with you.
7 Lessons
From my Friend’s Hobby Journey
1. You need to decide what you’re passionate about putting your spare time and scrapings of spare energy towards. Consciously choose a hobby that sparks and inspires you in some way.
2. Connect in with people who enjoy the same hobby as you. This will empower you to consistently show up for yourself and your activity of choice. Accountability and inspiration are a hallmark of connection with like minded people.
3. No matter how wildly busy you feel, there actually is time available in your schedule if you look for it. SO LOOK FOR IT! Claim it and find solutions to make it work.
4. When you pursue a hobby you’re passion about, it will fill up your cup and overflow into other areas of your life. Hobbies may take energy but they can also give it back tenfold.
5. Even on the days it’s hard to show up, a healthy and engaging hobby will give more than it takes from you. Showing up on the hard days are more often than not the times that you need an outlet the most.
6. When you pursue a hobby you love, you’ll rediscover old parts of yourself and create new parts of yourself to celebrate and love too. The self-expansion of hobbies allows you to see your life, your fellow man, and the world, in a whole new way.
7. When you show up for yourself, wonderful things happen.
What's The Simple Question That Could Ignite Your Spark?
My friend's journey shows that even the simplest spark (like a question about hobbies) can ignite something truly life-changing. Whether it’s writing, painting, synchronised swimming or something entirely different, the time you carve out for your passions can lead to transformative growth. If reading this has made you realise you want to uncover the passion that will elevate your life and help you reconnect with what truly fulfils you, then now’s my time to tell you that 1:1 life coaching may be the transformative experience that you need.
Let's explore how you can bring more joy, purpose, and cohesion into your days. Book a consultation and take the first step toward creating a life where both your personal and professional worlds can thrive, or dip your toes by signing up to receive my monthly motivation email.
Creating a life you love is in your hands!
Steph Edmunds
Certified Professional Life Coach & Team Facilitator
About the Author:
Steph Edmunds is a Tasmanian based Certified Professional Life Coach, Speaker and Facilitator specialising in Work/Life Cohesion and Sustainable Excellence for driven individuals and teams. Visit the Success Coaching Tasmania website for more information.